#6 Communication & Ethics

Looking at my own communication skills, I consider myself, naturally, more of an unassertive communicator.  I can see that I don't put myself out there often unless I need to.  When I speak in front of people I have no problem being assertive but when I am in a group, like a brainstorming group, then I usually take the back seat.  When I took the listening self-assessment, I scored a 67.  That is above the average of 61.  After looking through the questions, I saw that when emotions are a part of listening, I don not score as well.  If I am able to focus over emotions, then I would be able to listen better.  That is important especially during high stress situations.
An ethical dilemma that I had was there was a leader in the group that I was involved in and that person didn't want to be the leader anymore.  I didn't know if I should tell that person to step down or encourage them to keep going even when they didn't want to.  If I worked through this dilemma using the ends-based thinking, I would want to tell this person to step down.  I would see that it would do more damage if this person stayed leading then if they kept going.  I would most likely tell the person to step down regardless if they wanted to do it then or not.  Though this could cause some damage between relationships.
What I actually used was more of the care-based thinking.  I ended up just talking with this person on a regular basis and made sure they knew what was going on and what the consequences are to what their lack of passion was doing.  This person stepped down on their own and it kept a good relationship with everyone who was involved.

Environmental Influence

Whether we want to accept or deny it, our environment really does affect us. It shapes our perspectives, it shapes how we do things, it shapes our norms, and it shapes our lives.  An environment that really has affected me is my family.  They are who I have grown up with and have taught me much of what I know about life.  As a family, our beliefs are pretty much the same throughout.  We have a strong Christian foundation to our beliefs and we focus a lot on family.  I have seen this by my parents doing everything to show me the love of Christ and how to show that to others.  We haven't ever been very knowledgeable of theology, but I have learned the discipline of serving.  I grew up in soup kitchens, homeless shelters, and other places where we can serve.  I still keep in weekly communication with them and I not only see my immediate family all the time, but I also see my extended family many times throughout the year.  We have always grown up that dinner time with the family was important.  We all would sit around the dinner table and start off in prayer.  Then we would all talk and hang out.  I always loved having that as a daily part of our family.  We always joke around about each other and I've seen that isn't normal for some families.  We like to have running jokes about funny things someone has said.  It really does make hanging around your parents fun.  Because of all these things, it really reflects in all of our lives.  You can definitely tell if you are a Leedy.
My gender influences my values by how I operate in my relationships and friendships.  When I am around a group of guys is different than if I was around girls.  I can really go in depth with a guy about his life because we can relate.  I couldn't do that with a girl unless she was my girlfriend or wife.  There are certain boundaries that you operate in according to your gender. So if I am leading a group of guys, I would have no hesitance on going deep into their lives and challenge them that way. If I was leading a group of girls, I wouldn't go as deep because I need to understand my place as a male.  As for my race or ethnicity, they really don't come into play.  I am Polish, French-Canadian, and German, but my roots don't go deep.  These ethnic values really haven't shaped much of who I am, mostly because I really don't know the culture and haven't been a part of it. 

#3 The Group

a.      Everyone has experienced moments in their lives when they felt excluded from a group. Think about an experience when you felt like an outsider. What made you feel that way? Did someone help you to become part of the group? If so, how did they do this? If not, what would have helped you feel like you belong (belonged)?

A time where I felt excluded from a group was my freshman year of football.  Why I felt like that was because I was placed as the first string middle linebacker and then I was moved from that spot a week later to a guy who just joined the team because the coach wanted him to.  All of the starters knew each other from middle school and I didn't.  The coaches knew them all as well.  I never had the chance to get to know them before so it closed me out from the group.  I never became a part of that "group" but many of the 2nd and 3rd string guys hung out with me.  So we all naturally talked and I felt a part of that group.  The team didn't act as a whole but I'm glad I was a part of the team in that way rather than with the starters.

b.      Think about an organization you are in (or have been in). What knowledge, attitudes, values, and skills were necessary for an individual to achieve success in that organization? What knowledge, attitudes, values, and skills were necessary for organizational success? 

In student life, it is important that you have a heart for community and people.  It is important that your attitude is positive and encouraging, as well as challenging to the students.  You have to have a vision and a plan for what you want to do.  You should have at least a basic foundation of biblical knowledge.  This organization is built off of teamwork.  You have to be accountable and responsible.  You have to be flexible and want to work with a team.  You have to get to know who you are working with.  You have to be timely.  But most of all you have to love the Lord with all of your heart.